One thing I hear way too often from my students is how they feel like they're living their lives in what appears to be guilt.
Sometimes it’s because they feel they're living a lie.
Sometimes it’s because the only reason they’re currently breathing is because there's one person begging them to stay alive.
I can empathize with each and every student because in 2011, I felt the exact same way.
I distinctly remember lying on my bedroom floor with the sunlight beaming in from my window, only half hitting my face. It’s where I admitted to myself that I didn’t feel alive.
At this time in my life, I truly felt like I was watching a movie.
It was like my eyes were the lens in which the film was shot through.
Nothing felt real, I didn’t feel emotions other than pain and sadness, all I wanted to do was lie there - right where the sun could only half blind me.
I wanted to stay there until the sun went down, came up and went down again.
I felt like everyone was the enemy.
No matter what I was doing, I was constantly defensive.
No one could possibly have any idea what was going through my head.
There was no way anyone could even dream what I was going through mentally (or physically due to my eating disorder).
I didn’t believe anyone who offered help or positivity.
I was too wrapped in self-loathing that when a comment was made, I automatically took it as criticism or a back-handed compliment.
Honestly, the only reason I was living was because I felt obligated to live for someone else.
However, now I can see it was so I could be here for you. Each and every person reading these words are another reason why I stayed alive.
In 4 Hours To A More Fulfilling Lifestyle™ we will dive into how to manage your thoughts, how to release your fears and how to turn your vision of a perfect life into your own reality. It's a quick guide to radically loving yourself, unlocking your not-so-hidden potential and understanding how to conquer your anxieties. I can't wait to see you on the other side.